Character Info

DeityGorum.  Got a problem with that?

Used to be a horse who worshipped Iomeae
It didn't work out so well.

WhereaboutsWherever Pharasma put his soul this week

Character Sheet Goes Here

Star Wars

This war story famous in Gorum church but big secret outside world.  This story happen much long ago.  This story happen at place much far away.

One day beautiful princess find out evil king building death fortress.  She not find out evil king her father.  She beautiful, not smart.  She find out secret vulnerability death fortress.  Evil king make out of wood.  It flammable.  Evil king find out beautiful princess know about flammable wood, so him hunt for her to kill.  Him also not know them related.  Stupid run in family.  Beautiful princess give secret building plan (says “chop trees, make death fortress”) courier, send away to get help.  Courier have no arms.  Courier have no tongue.  Perfect choice for get help.

Stupid farmboy meet courier.  Courier give secret weakness.  Farmboy learn how fight, raise rebel army, rescue princess, burn down death fortress.  Much glory.

Give tease other Gorum story.  Evil king get away.  Also, farmboy evil king son, princess brother.  Them not find out until after kurvan.

Me-Book, Day 1.

Wake up.  Hear bird.  Squawk.  Bird come closer.  Hear many bird.  Maybe handful tens of ten.  What birds want?

Wake up again.  That not right.  Also leg hurt.  Sit up, look.

Wake up again again.  Maybe something very wrong.  Leg hurt more.  Sit up slow, look.  Dahaut rramabug zog!  «Shit-raping bird!»  Bird eating leg.  Kill, make stop.  Neck break easy.  See many bird.  Many dead men.  Many bird eat many dead men.  Know where am.  Battlefield.  Think maybe lost fight.

Check body.  Hurt bad.  Blood on hands.  Blood on legs.  Blood on head.  Much cut.  Much bruise.  Stand.  World spin.  Not good.  See battlefield all dead.  Only birds.  Only me.  Only blood.

Then see man.  Maybe man.  Warrior.  Armor no blood.  Maybe him winner.  Wave.  Come here, kurvhai.  «Come here, fucker.»  Maybe me win.  Maybe me die.  Odds good.  Only one him.

Warrior come.  Stand.  Just stand.  Okay.  Me fight.  Hit.  Kick.

Wake up again again again.  Short sleep only.  Only fall on knee.  Warrior still stand.  No fight back.  Weak.  Me stand again.  Fight.  Pick up stick.  Is not stick.  Is leg bone.  Still, use bone, hit.  Stab.  Fall down.  Get up.  Try trip.  No work.  Warrior armor heavy.  Him no move.  No move little.  No move big.  No move.  Okay.  More kick.  More punch.  More fall down.  Get up.  Smash head.  Twist arm.  Arm no move.  Make mad.  Hit.  Kick.  Hit hit hit hit.  Fall maybe.  Get up.  Hit.  Not sure what next.  Maybe kick.  Warrior still no move.  Me bleeding open.  Maybe broke leg.  Fingers all broke.  No can stand.  Warrior much blood.  All me.  Bad.  Punch with head.

Wake up again again again again.  Face on dirt.  Look.  Warrior still no move.  Rude.  Broken fist bang warrior foot.  So bad.  Bang again.  All have left but not give up.

That when warrior move.  Maybe him intimidated tireless resolve.

Him pick up sword.  Great sword.  Him hold blade.  Not haft.  Sword bleeding.  Not right but who am complain to?  Him swing sword.  Haft come fast.  Hit face.  Head probably fall off, fly across battlefield but no can say.

Me no dead.  Me no hurt.  Fingers okay.  Leg okay.  All okay.  What?  Warrior gone.  Sword at feet.  No bleeding now.  Pick up.  Time find food.

Next time wake up different.  No hurt.  No bleeding.  No broken bone.  Laying in crypt.  Think maybe all good dream.  But sword laying on chest.  Same sword Gorum use hit in face.  Maybe him way say we call fight draw.

Get up, find slabs many dead men.  Then realize where am.  Crypts under city where Prince Shamat (orc word mean ‘horror’) live.  Crypts him keep dead bodies Risen Guard.

So.  Sneak out.  Sneak away.  Make fight contest for food.  For shirt.  For shoe.  Much fighting until win pants.  Then leave sentence fragment city.  Think maybe palace guard not following.  Maybe.  But them find, them kill again until Prince need make fight.

  • Most frequent recurring not-a-villain

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